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Love Vs Arranged Marriage - What to Choose?

Hello,

I'm a 23year old girl seeing a guy for 1.5 years who is from another community. He is a very nice man and he takes good care of me. He loves me a lot and I know he is always going to be committed. Both our parents know about our relationship. However, my parents are not quite comfortable me marrying a person from another caste. So, they showed me a guy from my own caste.

The new guy that my parents showed me is very good looking, smart, rich and I know he has the capacity to keep me happy. The problem is that I'm getting attracted to this new guy and I'm feeling guilty that I will be ditching my boyfriend who cares and loves me a lot. I haven't given a reply to my parents yet and they want me to consider their choice seriously for everyone's long-term benefits.

If I choose the new guy, my boyfriend will be in deep pain and on the other hand if I choose my boyfriend, my parents will be in deep pain. Either way I'm going to hurt someone... I don’t know what to do and I'm in a depression.

Please help...

**

My question to you: What will give you the most happiness? Who is most right for you?

When marriages are not arranged, things get a lot more complicated. We are attracted to, fall in love with, to someone. We see someone for a long time. Sometimes we find out that the person is not right for us. Feelings change.

Sometimes we get attracted to someone else. Sometimes that is the right person. Sometimes we end up realizing it’s not the right person.

Complicated.

What I hear most from you is that you are very concerned about the pain of others. What about your pain? If you do things to please your parents or the man you’ve been seeing, what about you? If you spend your life with someone you do not love as much, what will be your pain?

For many people, it isn’t easy to pay that much attention to themselves. Many of us have learned to pay most attention to what other people want.

My big suggestion to you: take time to listen to yourself. Spend more time with the person your parents have arranged for you. How right does it feel?

Also, before you go to sleep, let your mind go to the question of who is best for you. Don’t try to come to an answer. Often the answer comes to us during the night, from deep within us. In the morning, check to see if you know the answer.

If you do end up hurting the feelings to the man you’ve been seeing, imagine it from the other side. Would you want someone to marry you, if that other person actually preferred to marry someone else? Imagine living all your life with someone who preferred someone else?

I don’t know what you are like. But I want someone who truly wants me.

So I come again to my suggestion: find out what you truly want.

And if you like, let me know how your story continues.

All the best and may you have much love and happiness in your life.

P.S. Your title is: love versus arranged marriage. But what I hear is something different. You are wondering whom you could love most. That for me is the fundamental question.

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to love-relationship-problem.


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elsas word story image idea music emporium.com

 

 

 

menu
choices ...

THE IDEA EMPORIUM


WORDS & MUSIC


THE FLUFFERS BOOK


CREATIVITY BLOG

plus ...

MY CHOSEN HOME

THE SEXE-TETES

DR ZEE'S LOVELINE

plus ...

MUSICIAN WANTED





contact



 

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TO UPDATES
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