Caring - at least for some of us, it's a core part of a life that has meaning for us. I care - and I have something to get up for in the morning. I care - and life is full, overfull, with passion, curiosity, initiative, pleasure. I don't care - life is dull, boring, a drag. So what, I don't care - I'm sullen, numb, angry, unless there are also things I care for. I care - I warm up.

Caring connects me. To someone I know - partner, child, friend, family, student. To someone in a novel, film, news report. To something - an interest, a concern, a passion. Caring also connects me to myself - I care about my interests, health, future, life, well-being, choices.

On Caring
love, empathy, compassion,
anxiety, worry, dread, fear, plus ...

I've been thinking a lot about caring lately.

Every day, the news broadcasts so many human-made horrors. Massacres, starvation and rape in Darfur. Much of Africa a humanitarian crisis with the devastation of Aids, corruption, hunger, violence. Suicide bombers. Mothers murdering their children.

Yet all around me I see caring people.

Caring. I think of the word.

At first I come to all kinds of nice emotions: love, empathy, sympathy, warmth, compassion, tenderness, protectiveness. I care - and the heart melts.

Soon, even with caring, I bump into less pleasant feelings: anxiety, worry, dread, fear. We care - so we hover, smother, fret, worry, overprotect, obsess. Sometimes we worry because the risk is high. Sometimes we just worry, no matter what. Sometimes also, emotions emerge that have nothing to do with caring: jealousy, greed, envy, rage. We care. Things don't go as we want. Wham.

And them, even when the feeling is one of concern, one can get lots of controlling behavior, harsh punishment, rigid standards. "I'm doing this for your own good." Maybe so, but often not. "I know better than you." And then there's often a well of bitterness and disappointment when one doesn't succeed.

Even with caring, things aren't all sweetness and light.

All the same, caring. When I say, I care, I can feel things shift inside me. I want to do whatever it will take to protect what I care for. I want whatever I care for to grow, develop, flourish. I care - and I want to know how are things going with whoever or whatever I care for. I'm interested in what's happening. I spend time researching a topic. I care about caring - and here I am, writing about it.

****

I care, right now, to start figuring out some of the ingredients needed for healthy caring. Right now, I don't want to go far - or my own well of time would run dry. But I care to start, and send my start out to the world. I figure that, between my own caring to continue, and responses from others who care, this exploration of caring will grow in its own way and on its own time, with enough caring attention.

Today I'm just going to look at a few ingredients, the ones that are foremost in my mind right at this moment - emotions, mirroring and good priorities. And then, a list of more ingredients.

Caring
Ingredient #1 - Emotions click here

Caring
Ingredient #2 - Being Seen, and Reflected Back  click here

Caring
Ingredient #3 - Good Priorities  click here
RIGHT NOW I AM INCLINED TO THINK THAT THIS
MAY BE THE MOST INGREDIENT IN CARING.
AT THE VERY LEAST, IT IS CRUCIAL. click here

More Ingredients  click here

****

To be continued.

signed,

Dr Zee
October 2006

copyright © Elsa Schieder 2006, 2008 - all rights reserved
publishing house - FlufferDuff Impressions 2006, 2008

****

YOUR COMMENTS, YOUR THOUGHTS, YOUR EXPERIENCES:
GOOD CARING, BAD CARING, MIXED CARING
AND WHAT YOU SEE AS MOST IMPORTANT IN CARING

Click here to go to from Good Caring
to everything on Dr Zees Loveline.

Good caring. Caring priorities. Caring connects us.
But caring also brings worry anxiety for those we care for.
Dr Zees LoveLine explores caring, from the urge to protect,
to the urge to control.

Dr Zees LoveLine
"In love you could shine like a brilliant star."
Fortune Cookie

DR ZEES LOVELINE
SHELLS * SPELLS * CARING * CONNECTION * CRAZINESS
love liking hate anger rage disconnection boredom * relationships relating *
good caring descriptions caring * i caring you caring but how *
good caring bad caring * emotions caring * caring arm * loving heart *
good caring * i caring *descriptions caring * you must be caring *
caring deeds * caring touches * caring arm * human possibilities and limitations *
hurting others * loss grief sorrow * elevation * admiration * elation * loving longing lusting *
good caring * connections interconnections * terror dread horror anguish *
perception misperception misconceptions lying deceiving self-deception denial *
recognition joy welcome warmth * craziness * crazy thinking * connections to social issues
like prejudice, fundamentalism, terrorism, genocide, peace *
SHELLS * SPELLS * CARING * CONNECTION * CRAZINESS
DR ZEES LOVELINE

Dr Zees LoveLine

DR ZEES LOVELINE
love liking longing aching wanting desiring having holding caring *
hate anger rage outrage disgust * disconnection boredom *
good caring descriptions caring * i caring you caring but how *
good caring bad caring * emotions caring * caring arm * loving heart *
good caring * i caring *descriptions caring * you must be caring *
caring deeds * caring touches * caring arm *
human possibilities and limitations *
connections to social issues
like prejudice, fundamentalism, terrorism, genocide, peace *
DR ZEES LOVELINE

MORE ...

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