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SELF? SHADOW? - which
is which? - June 17, 2010
SELF BETRAYAL -
June 6, 2010
SHADOW WORK -
the vampire archetype -
June 6, 2010
HOW TO STOP ANGER - quick
anger cure? - Apr 18, 2010
EVERYTHING HAS CHANGED -
Mar 12, 2010
SHIFTING REALITIES -
Nov 19, 09
AVOIDANCE? or SANITY? -
Nov 1, 09
DEATH BY CHATTER -
Oct 25, 09
INSIDER OUTSIDER -
Oct 23, 09
TRAVEL THOUGHTS -
roads never taken before -
Oct 16, 09
LIFE PATTERN:
try try try again
- Oct 10, 09
A PERSONAL PATTERN:
I start with desire - Oct 7, 09
BLOG POSTINGS
A STRANGE SECRET
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LOVE-NOT JUNKIE - BURIED LOVE
PLEASE HELP
BRAVE NEW DIRECTION - SPEAKING AS AN EXPERT
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When is it emotional repression?
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November 1, 2009
IS THIS AVOIDANCE? - or is it sanity?
I know we can repress emotions and that is bad for us. We can also wallow in them and that is likewise bad for us. Then, according to some, we choose how we respond - and it's important to choose stuff like joy and gratitude.
Okay - I feel like someone at a crossroads with signs posting every which way - all with dangers ahead. Emotional repression to the left - snakes and crocodiles. Wallow to the right - quicksand and tarpits. Choose joy - but of course beware emotional repression.
This isn't just some academic thing: what to do if faced with some strong and painful emotions.
I remember when my father died. I chose to teach two days later. And for the class time, the grief stopped. It was the start of the semester. I didn't want to be faced, a week later, with students who had basically lost interest. Plus I felt I could do the teaching, wanted to do it. I didn't try to hide my father's death from my students. But during class time, the grief was almost completely gone. Another part of me was there - very present for the students.
Today was less extreme. But something happened earlier today. Grief. Upsetness. All that kind of thing. I felt it. I acknowledged it, expressed it.
Then I went to work - and had a very productive day. At the start, I was very low key. Then a bit of fire got going. Now I feel really good about all I've accomplished.
Would it have been better to stay with the sad stuff?
I know it isn't good to bury it. It doesn't make for fertile ground - buried grief. My experience: it doesn't rot. It turns to stone, and also makes a lot of other stuff turn to stone.
I know what one is supposed to do - there are recipes for everything. Express and release.
Well, with how much expression has one expressed enough?
And when there are strong feelings, release isn't that easy. Things take time.
Anyway, no magic formula.
Now I'm stopping for the day. I will see what happens with my feelings.
****
Next day. There is something to taking action, getting one's mind off things. There is also avoidance. I go near there again - numbness and despair - but those are just words now, though they are words forming in my head.
I know: one can only go forward. Nothing can undo the past. What's done is done.
I also think: so much to learn about grabbing the moment, giving it one's best shot, rather than waiting for the best moment, waiting until the other is ready, letting the other have space.
Anyway, now words like devastation are forming in my head. Still working, and working well. Mixed feelings. And much that needs to be done now. No choice at the moment, unlike yesterday when I chose to do, and felt satisfaction in the doing. Another disappointment today. Which again I faced, after some moments, with doing - and now, before going on to things that need to be done, people arriving, with a short moment to check inward
....
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Blog Journals, Diary Blogs. When is it emotional repression?
What are good choices? Bad choices?
Personal Development Blog, Self Improvement Blogs.
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