A down day. A dull day. A nothing feels right day.
I need to get through to another day.
Even when down, I know there's hope. Can't feel it. How to act hopeful?
Personal Growth Blog. Self Development Blog. Creativity Blog.

SEPTEMBER 9, 2007

THERE ARE DAYS THAT DO NOT FEEL RIGHT

Maybe it's just that I didn't get enough sleep last night. Maybe it's that I've put off taking a bath until now, evening. Whatever it is, today isn't a great day inside me.

So much further I want to reach - and today everything feels out of reach. I've tried hard enough and more than hard enough, the inside voices go.

At other times, I go on and on even when I'm not getting far.

And I do recognize that it's only a bit over a year since this site started being up on the web.

But today things just don't feel right.

One of the cats - Petit Chat, Little Cat - who is blind and hearing impaired, isn't doing that well. It has nothing to do with her lack of sight and limited hearing. She may have eaten an aspirin Friday morning, so spent the day at the vet's, being made to vomit and stuff like that because aspirin is toxic for cats and dogs (I was with her much of the time). Anyway, she is feeling worse today, Sunday, than she was when I brought her home Friday - most likely because she has a very sore esophagus and stomach from all she was forced to ingest to make her vomit.

But that isn't it - that's just one part of it.

I need my stuff to be out in the world much more than it is.

Diana - so good meeting up with her this week. Editor. And general good fairy.

My hope: meeting with her regularly will take a load off me, will help me in my quest to reach much more of the world.

Wrote something a bit earlier - from the sense, so common and yet often so far away, that it's all a bit much.

I know, at the same time, that tomorrow is another day, and much more can happen, and also muc more will feel possible on the inside.

I think of teenagers - committing suicide more than ever before. The most recent stats: up 21% from the previous statistics. I think: teenagers don't have the experience to know that the downtime is just a phase, just a mood - and that energy, joy, delight will come again, given time and a bit of effort.

So I am living this day of despair, but it isn't true despair, because I know the mood will pass, the moment will give way to another. I will go to sleep and wake up, most likely, with more energy, more belief that I will be able to reach at least part of what I need to reach to come to any kind of fulfillment.

As always, welcome into my world.

signed,

Elsa
creating, connecting, exchanging -
or anyway, trying to

SEPTEMBER 9, 2007

copyright © Elsa Schieder 2007
publishing house - FlufferDuff Impressions 2007

Previous - September 8, 2007

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